#4, Health

Well, finally back home after hours at the in-laws for the big Thanksgiving dinner, and it was really wonderful - family, friends, food, fun, and laughter. Driving home tonight about 10:30, enjoying the crisp, cool evening, I was thinking about our day. We were all reminded today about how very blessed we have been with our health. In the middle of our celebration, my daughter Lori went to visit a friend whose husband is dealing with a very serious health issue right now, a young man in his late 30s/early 40s, with two children. It really wakes you up to the things that are important in this life.

I have friends and family who deal with health issues - high blood pressure, diabetes, heart conditions, learning disabilities, etc. - and then there's me, with no issues except arthritis in my knees (some days they're "crankier" than others), a tendency to eat too much (stress) and exercise too little (lazy), and that's basically it. I am so thankful each day to wake up (!) able to get out of bed, take care of myself, have a place to live that I love, family and friends close by, and be able to marvel at this beautiful world we live in.

#3, Friends

Friends - what a blessing they are! They sweeten the joy, lift a burden, bolster your courage, share our pride in accomplishments, commiserate on the failures, help us to laugh at ourselves, extend a hand when we fall, and enrich our lives. Of course, there are friends and then there are friends. My friend BJ (Bobbie Jo) is the best example of a true friend that I've ever known in my life. I have known her and her family for 22 years now, and I know without question that I can call her for anything and she'll be right there. Her husband Walter is a perfect match for her, and he shares her with me without restrictions and is right beside her in supporting and loving me as their friend.

My friend Diane and her husband Steve are more recently-acquired friends but it was a good fit right from the start. They're great fun to be around, ready to set off on an excursion at the drop of a hat, and I cherish their friendship.

There are friends that have faded into the past, friends that have passed on, even friends that walked away, but I am grateful for the time that our lives touched and the lessons they taught me.

#2, Teachers

Tuesday night, and we went to my grandson's grade school performance about the Nutcracker. Now, I'll have to admit that when I heard that, my first thought was, "That's a little ambitious for elementary school, for crying out loud!" The last one we went to was my granddaughter's program a couple of years ago at the same school, and the dance department did something, then the drama group did something (with badly- or not-working microphones) and it took f o r e v e r. This time, the dancers and drama kids did their thing while the choir sang music from The Nutcracker, and it was really fun! They did an amazing job, the dancers were so cute, ditto the drama kids, and it was over in about 45 minutes!! What more could you ask? Really, though, it was very cute and well done.

So, next on my list of things that I'm thankful for - I'm thankful that there are still school teachers who care, who want to broaden a child's horizon, who work long hours for not much pay, and really make a difference. And I'm thankful for the teachers that I had in school, the ones who names and faces I still remember as if it were yesterday, including my kindergarten teacher! (and that's going back some!!) Teachers like Mrs. Mitchell, Mr. Garside, Mrs. Garrett to name a few, who made learning fun, who encouraged, cajoled, threatened, and cheered us on!

A Week of Thanks - #1, Family

Okay, so I realize that my post last night had a little bit too much whi-i-i-i-ine to it, so I've decided to do a short post every night through Thanksgiving about things that I'm thankful for, triggered either by random thoughts or events of the day.

Today's blog is about family. Last night for a while I was doing some genealogy research, mostly about my mom's side of the family because my dad's family tree is complete pretty far back. My mom's family is another story, so I've decided to get back on the hunt for info on the Brandon and Woodmansee lines, plus fill in some blanks and verify info on my dad's Merrill and Lytle lines.

As I was working on it this morning, I decided to verify some info on my dad's brother Edgar. I put his name in, looking for "all" information, and when it came up, not only was his birth date there, so was his death date - five years ago!! I was really upset, not only because he was the last of the eight kids (seven boys and one girl) still living, but because not one had called to tell us!! I did some research and found the phone number for one of my cousins, wanting to find out why no one had told us; by the time I found her number and she began talking to me, I realized that from the last time I had talked to another one of the cousins (which didn't seem like that long ago) and the time that Edgar died, both my sister and I had gotten ride of our landline numbers and switched completely to cell phones - and nobody in Arizona had the new numbers! I remember when I was in high school my dad telling me that the older you get, the faster time goes - and man is that true. We get so caught up in the details of living, that it's way too easy to lose contact with the people we love.

So - back to the purpose of this blog. I am so very, very thankful for my family. I'm the youngest of three children - a girl (Gail), then a boy (Richard), and then (9 years later!!!) me. Mom and Dad are gone, our brother is gone, so there is only my sister and I, and I am really thankful that she and I are close and can get together often, and have such fun when we do.

I'm also very grateful for my daughter Lori - she's an amazing woman, braver than I ever was, not afraid to stand up for herself, and an incredible mother and wife. Her husband Kirk adores her and the kids, and after 15 years together, they're still good friends and very much in love. Their two kids Kaitlin, 13, and Payton, 9, and such cool kids, and they love hangin' out with grandma!

Well, I blew the "short" part about this post, but I wanted my familyto know how much I love them, and I am very thankful for their love and support.

Sunday Blues

It’s Sunday evening and, even though I’m currently sans job and don’t have to get up early tomorrow, I’m feeling kinda down, a little reminiscent of the old “where the heck did the weekend go” blues. Part of it is the job interview I had last week. Don’t get me wrong, it was great – great interview (at least from my side of the table) and an amazing job! If I had been put to the task of writing out my ideal job, eliminating making a living doing my GIS mapping or as an artist, of course, the kind of things this company does are, well, just what I love doing. The company does research and analysis, and they even have a GIS person on staff. To paraphrase what Matthew Perry says to Salma Hayek in Fools Rush In: “It’s everything I never knew I wanted”. The only catch is that I wouldn’t be doing the research and analysis part – I’d be the Admin Assistant, doing regular-type stuff for that position. Anyway, I think I’d be a good match for the company as an Admin, and I know that I’d love working there…I just have to wait until “next week” when I hear something from them one way or the other.

Maybe another part of the bluesy feeling is the holiday coming up. I’m at the point in my life that when I look around a holiday table, there are a lot of much-loved faces that are missing. Plus, for the last several years, I’ve lived in either an apartment or my small condo – kind of small to host a family dinner. So, it has kind of evolved into a set thing – we go to my son-in-law’s family’s home for Thanksgiving and then (because of the grandkids) everyone goes to my daughter (Lori) and son-in-law (Kirk’s) home for Christmas.

You know how it is when you mesh two families together – different traditions, different habits, different ways of doing things. My family has always liked, not a formal dinner, but a fancy table – you know, the good china, the sparkling glassware, shiny silverware, all of them handed down, with many fond memories attached. Kirk’s family is more laid back and casual - but Linda, Kirk’s mom, certainly sets a wonderful table – she’s a great cook!! They are also a family of game-players, so often they play cards or something after dinner. My favorite evening was when Kirk’s cousin Robin taught us how to play bunco, resulting in much silliness and laughter!!!

Kirk’s family always makes me feel welcome and included, it’s just, well….I miss getting to cook. I can hear all those gasps and/or guffaws out there from you women who cook every holiday meal. Sweet Kirk (who is the cook in their house) has shared the cooking with me at Christmas a couple of times, and that helps some. When my Lori was little, I couldn’t seem to get her interested much in learning to cook. So one day, I said “What are you doing to do about feeding your family when you get married?” and she replied (with all the wisdom of her 9 or so years) “I’m going to marry a man who cooks.” and that’s exactly what she did!

One thing that my daughter does cook is the pumpkin pies for the holiday dinners, and let me tell you, she definitely takes after my mom – amazing pies! One Thanksgiving (one of the first few years they were married) Kirk’s dad Gene said “Everybody’s always talking about how good your pumpkin pies are – mine are just as good or better, so this Thanksgiving I’ll make some of my own, and we’ll see whose pie everyone likes better!” So, the contest was on, and Lori took special care with her pies that year. After dinner, Gene went out into the garage to get his pie, and as we were cutting and serving the pies, Lori (who had come to know her father-in-law pretty well by now) kept saying “You didn’t make this pie. You did not make this pie.” But Gene kept insisting that he had baked the pie. As we were starting to taste the pies, one of the kids, Lori or Kirk, went out to the garage to get a soda out of the 2^nd refrigerator, and there on the counter was a Mrs. Smith’s Pumpkin Pie box!!!! What a teaser!

Furry Sleeping Pills and Other Catly Duties

I decided to take a nap this afternoon, so I laid down on my bed, and my two furry sleeping pills joined me soon after. The big longhair is Sashi and the shorthair is Cubby. The reference to cats as sleeping pills comes from my daughter, and boy is she right! There's just something about that warm little body (or in Sashi's case, not so little!), the wonderful rumble of the purring, that just relaxes me right into sleep.

Since I had the internet service installed and got my computer hooked up on a table in my bedroom, Sashi has decided that's his domain. He lays on the end of the table most of the time, but lately if I get up to go get a drink or something, I come back to find he's taken possession of the chair! He has a tendency to lay his body completely over my right forearm, which makes for some very interesting mousework! Most of the time, like if I'm playing a game or looking at facebook - anything that doesn't require actual typing - I push the keyboard back from the edge of the table and he sits or lays between my chest and the keyboard, purring away, while we cuddle. Pretty cool. The problem comes when he wants to lay down, and doesn't lay straight down (or after a while shifts his weight) to where his hip, or elbow, or butt ends up on the keyboard. Then it's beep! beep! beep! till I shove him out of the way.

Right now Sashi's sitting at my elbow, watching my fingers moving over the keyboard, as if to say "Now, don't you tell any lies about me!". The other night, he shifted onto the keyboard so that his whole body was laying on it. My screen went black - then when it came back, everything was upside down!!!! I've been using a computer for, oh, almost 20 years, and I've never had that happen....so obviously I didn't know how to fix it! Restarted the computer, shut it down completely for a few minutes - nothing worked. And boy, trying to read the help sections upside down - yuck, made me sick to my stomach!.

Finally, I made the interesting discovery that, by hitting the Control, Alt, and arrow keys, you can rotate your screen display in a specific direction (corresponding to the arrow). Life is never dull with my furry friends, but I love it!!!

A Family of Gearheads

I am really loving our weather lately: cool mornings, mild days, lovely evenings where just walking to the mail box or going for a drive is a pleasure. Las Vegas doesn’t get nearly enough of the “transitional” seasons of spring and fall – seems like it’s either blazing hot or cold. (Alright, I can hear snickers from you guys who live in those states where the snow piles up high - so we’ll concede the point that “cold” is a relative term, okay?) Anyway, when newcomers to Vegas make a remark like “Man, I really miss the change of seasons.” or “How can you stand it with no spring or fall?”, my response is usually something like “Vegas does have spring, you just have to pay attention – remember those 5 or 6 days two weeks ago?”

Yesterday I took my grandkids to a car show – what a blast! It’s all done to raise money for Parkinsons disease, and there’s always a great turnout. There were muscle cars, roadsters, classics, we were in motor heaven! I got a call Friday night from my ex-husband, letting me know the show was this weekend, and hoping that the grandkids and I would want to come as he’d be helping out there all day. Some people think it’s very strange that my ex and I are friends and still see each other; well, let me tell you, it hasn’t always been that way, but I’m glad we made it to this place. From the time we decided to divorce, we made up our mind that our daughter wasn’t going to pay for our screwups, so we were going to do our best to make sure she didn’t get caught in the middle (sometimes more successfully than others, I'm sure). We’ve always been able to deal well regarding her, and while there were years we weren’t close, at least we weren’t hateful to each other.

Now, a ways down the road, we’re friends again. We meet for a soda once in a while, take the grandkids somewhere, chat on the phone now and then, etc., with his wife’s knowledge, of course. It’s nice, you know, to be able to still be close to someone with whom you share so much history. We can reminisce, poke fun about old situations, etc. Our daughter’s coworkers are amazed when she casually mentions that we’re taking the grandkids to a movie, or the drags, or going to dinner, even though we’ve been divorced for about 26 years. One of her coworker made a comment something like “Good Lord, if my parents did that, they’d probably have to call SWAT!!!”

While we were at the car show, a friend asked if the grandkids had enjoyed themselves, or if they were bored. I said "No, they are as nuts about cars as I am!" The friend said, "Well, I guess they come by it naturally." So, yes, I am proud to say that we are a family of gearheads!!

California Cruisin'

This summer, after three months of worry and stress, and dealing with my mortgage company, filing for unemployment (and remembering to file every Sunday!) I decided to do the adult thing - - - and run away! Oh, not very far, just to my sister’s in California. She lives in the gorgeous little town of Morro Bay (that's Morro Rock to the left), and since her birthday is July 4th, that seemed like a great excuse to run away and try to learn to breathe again. My darling daughter Lori and her husband Kirk encouraged me to go because – after all – I could still look for work on the internet and file on Sunday over the phone, and they would be happy to come by and feed and cosset my kitties while I was gone. Obviously, it took little persuasion before I was in the car, headed for California.

One of the things I discovered about myself many years ago is that, despite the fact that I am a desert rat born and raised (as was all my family), I get to where I miss the ocean something fierce. My sister moved to California when she got married, and she’s been there ever since, so we got to visit her a couple of times a year, and I found that there is just something about walking along the beach, the ocean air, the breeze, the sound of the surf – aaaaaahhhhhhh, heaven! I wish that I could teleport you all to the beach with me, or provide a “scratch and sniff” (click and sniff??) so that you could smell the ocean air, but I guess that’s out of the question.

I love going to visit my sister Gail – we’re alike in so many ways that sometimes it’s scary, other times laughable – but we can go for a drive, go shopping, or just sit and read, and still have fun. We did a lot of fun things while I was there, like birthday parties for her nephew (July 2nd) and her, breakfast at an awesome place in Cambria where we sat and watched seals and (I swear) dolphins, visiting with family, etc. My sister’s younger son had a barbecue for her birthday/ Independence Day – friends, neighbors, and so on. One of the people there was a young teenage boy who, for the holiday, had bright blue hair. He was fake-moaning about how everyone was picking on him about his blue hair, and I said, “Well, I’m certainly not going to give you a bad time - besides, put us with Gail and we're the most patriotic people here, so let’s get someone to take our picture so we can prove it.” It’s such a cool shot – him with blue hair, me with bright red, and Gail with white hair!! What made it doubly funny (and what we didn’t even realize at the time) is that we had red, white, and blue shirts on too!!

It was all so much fun, but when I look back at that week, the thing I remember most, the feeling that comes back immediately, is driving up the coast road toward Monterey, in and out of the fog, windows open, laughing, and enjoying the twists and turns of Highway 101. At one point, I realized that for the first time in months, there was not a bit of tension in my body – just complete and utter relaxation and joy.

Thanks, big sis – I love ya!

All Gone Paycheck

So there I was, minding my own business, living my life – working, reading, visiting with friends, hanging out with family – when, after years and years of working, I suddenly find myself in the rapidly swelling ranks of the unemployed! What a shocker – there’s no backup, no lovely “cushion” in the bank, I’m living paycheck to paycheck when poof - all gone paycheck.

I’d love to tell you that I spent a couple of days wallowing, picked myself right up, and found a new job – but I hate lying, so I can’t say that. I did get right on the job search, but (as my daughter says) holy my cow - has the job market ever changed!!! None of that old apply for a job, get an interview, eventually get hired, oh no, that would be too easy. These days if you don’t have a computer and the internet at home, you are seriously screwed! I tried using the computer at my daughter’s house, but if they were busy, or one of the grandkids needed the computer, or….you get the picture – it was just too easy to not go at all. So I bit the bullet, ordered internet service (oh goodie, another bill) and started off. I’ve been out of work for 6 months now, and we’re heading into the holiday season when (so I’ve been told) most companies put a hold on hiring. I do have to say I’m very, very grateful for unemployment compensation – and I just got the emergency extension so I’m “safe” for another while. It’s not that unique a position to be in, lots and lots of people are in the same boat, so – you just grit your teeth, hang on, and pray.

Which brings me to a lovely story I’d like to share with you. At one of the entrance/ exits from a local shopping center, there are a couple of homeless guys (one in a wheelchair) who sit with their little sign, hoping for a little help. They’ve been there a long time – good guys just down on their luck. I got in the habit of stopping to say hi, give them a little cash, maybe buy them a sandwich or at least some water during our lovely summers – not a big thing, but I was glad to help. They’re funny, sweet, and always say “we love talking to you, and we don’t care if you give us money or not, just please stop and say hi”. A couple of weeks ago, I had to go pay my phone bill, and on the way out of the center, I stopped to talk to the guys. Told them “sorry, I don’t have any cash today” and again they said they didn’t care, they just liked to talk to me. We started chatting about various things – the weather has finally started cooling off, people, etc., when they asked how my job hunt was going (told you we talk a lot). I was telling how tough it was getting no responses, never knowing what’s “wrong” with your resume and so on, when Steven says to me “Don’t worry, you’ll find something – and we’ll put you in our prayer circle tonight.” As I drove away (after thanking them and offering my prayers in return) I was crying, and thinking that’s why I had to pay my phone bill in cash today instead of over the phone. I was so touched and humbled that two guys who are homeless were offering prayers for me. Sure put things in perspective.

So, you lift your head, pull yourself up by your bootstraps, and move on.